Patti Stanger on TYRA

So Yes I watched Tyra Friday(way rare for me). The only reason is because Patti Stanger was on there as well as Nitro from American Gladiator (was my fav gladiator) who was talking about his addiction to steriods and the effects it has on not only men, but women as well.  Anyway Patti  gave some great advice. Her book is on my wishlist. I love her show Millionaire Matchmaker.  Only thing I have a bit of a prob with is the hair part.  But as Zabeth said we have to remember she doesn’t know or understand that’s a hot topic with in the AA community.

Who would have though that NY is the worst place to be for a single woman. 5 women to 1 man or something like that.

http://tyrashow.warnerbros.com/2009/04/millionaire_matchmaker_tips.php

Hair Propaganda, Negatvity, Disrespect Will Not be Tolerated!!!!!!!

I’m going to warn everyone now!  I’m like Khadija in that I don’t tolerate hair propaganda or on my blog. I don’t tolerate negativity on it either. So that means no woa as me, black women at the bottom of the totem pole stuff either. So if this doesn’t fit with liking, thinking, element.  Then this blog is not for you. That means no natural vs. straight or processes or whatever. No black women wanting to be like white women or other women because they were weave and ish like that. Again no black women are at the bottom of the totem pole, black women are undesirable etc. This blog is to uplift black women not tear them down.   No light-skinned vs. Darkskinned mess will be tolerated.  Again if this blog is not for you then please find a blog that is. And if conversations go in this route know that they will not be tolerated and deleted. If it keeps going on the person will be banned from the blog.

I try to stay off of black men as much as possible as this is a blog dedicated to the upliftment of black women.  So please respect that or leave.

How to Protect Our Image

Petitions
http://www.thepetitionsite.com/
http://www.petitiononline.com/
http://www.gopetition.com/
http://www.ipetitions.com/
http://www.change.org/
http://mashable.com/2009/07/21/twitter-petitions/  (petition on twitter. Didn’t think of that. Maybe this could also work with Myspace, Facebook etc.)
http://epetitions.net/
http://www.petitionspot.com/
http://takeastand.at/
http://upetitions.com/
http://www.webpetitions.com/
http://www.hyperpetition.com/ (It’s pay though)

Something to think about with internet and email petitions
http://ask-leo.com/why_are_internet_petitions_a_bad_idea.html
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/petition/internet.asp
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/p/petitions.htm

I don’t look at these as saying e petitions are bad. To me it just tells me that we have to find ways to make sure we are effective with e petitions.

Here’s a Petition for BET to change it’s images of black people
http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/change-bet.html  or should we say bw.
http://www.petitiononline.com/h72w2a11/petition.html
http://www.petitiononline.com/rkelly/petition.html  (I was actually surprised there were so many signatures)
http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/YTtakedownhatevideos  (for YT Videos that Bash Black Women)

http://www.gopetition.com/howtostartapetition.php
http://www.onlinepetition.com/how-to-write-petition
http://www.caveat.org/links/start_petition.html  (petition info on gov action)
http://hubpages.com/hub/How-to-Start-a-Petition
http://www.ehow.com/how_16629_write-petition.html

http://www.prisonplanet.com/Pages/activist_article_start_a_movement.html
http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Take-a-Trend-Start-a-Movement-and-Complete-a-500-Year-Plan&id=434893
http://www.socialmediatoday.com/SMC/45510
http://www.worldvision.org/aoa.nsf/0783167f5da26bf6872570a200775036/c88dc4aa3b4ef1ba8825733e001217c5/$FILE/How%20to%20Start%20a%20Movement.pdf  (focus is on aids, but could be used to start any movement)
http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2009/06/youre-bad-idea-may-start-a-movement/  (crazy,could be used to show how social movements can form)

http://www.weblip.com/

http://www.ehow.com/how_2106710_start-grassroots-movement.html

I totally agree with his comment “Keith Barger
3 June 2009 at 11:47 am #
1st guy joined – nothin. But 2nd guy joined – BINGO!
2nd guy was the guy with influence. The guy whose friends will follow wherever he goes.
You gotta find that 2nd guy.”

Boycotts
http://www.causecast.org/news_items/9429-how-to-organize-a-boycott
http://www.ehow.com/how_135682_organize-boycott.html
http://www.boycottowl.com/
http://www.ehow.com/how_2303436_boycott-company.html

Not a fan of TP, but I have to say that this is a good idea http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1355/is_19_112/ai_n24219203/  though we need to do this to black people degrading just as much as white people or non-black peple degrading black women.

We could also start a women’s political party for bw
http://www.imow.org/wpp/stories/viewStory?storyId=1694

I also wonder if having a form of tea parties is a good idea
http://www.freedomworks.org/blog/bstein80/how-to-organize-your-own-%E2%80%9Ctea-party%E2%80%9D-protest not sure thought, because protests can turn into ralleys and ralleys can get ugly

A good way to chat everyone has different IM’s or none at all is Chatzy. There are also other sources for chat

Sorry for all the links. I just think this is a great idea. What ideas does everyone else have?

Why The Sistah’s Rules is Crap

http://www.rulesgirlcelebrityblog.com/2010/02/rules-work-on-any-man-jamie-foxx-case.html .  I made the mistake of reading the Sistah’s Rules by Denene Millner a while ago. 

I remember feeling that something about the book didn’t feel right.  I remember someone else in the BWE mentioning how jacked up this book is, but I can’t remember who. Hmmm could have been because the way author tells black women that what works on a white man or other men won’t work on a black man.  In other words she encouraging black women to give it up to keep the man. She wrote it as a black version of The Rules as written by Ellein Fein. Women I will tell you know if you see that book run the other way. I remember thinking why would I want a bm if I have to give it up to him to keep him.  That doesn’t sound like a gbm to me.  I think as bw we really have to becareful of these black versions of white and other non-black authors.  I finally read the Rules and saw that Ellen feins version was way better. It doesn’t matter the race because men are men just like women are women. We may have our culture, society etc. differences, but we have many similarities as well. That is mos def a dangerous book for young women.

Excommunicate Today

A.M.O.P.S. – Defending the Honor of Black Women

I believe in the whole excommunicating people even bw if we have to, but not just bw, but bm, am,wm,ww, corporations etc. I’ve always believed that the only way to keep black women away from sterotypical roles is to shame. I know people will think that’s harsh, but think about how many children are taught. They know it would shame, dissapoint, and hurt their parents, family, friends etc. who worked hard to get them an education and opportunities. They know that these people expect the best of them so that’s what they give them. I believe we should excommunicate Hollywood any movie, music, other media, businesses etc. that sterotypes us. That also means excommunicating friends, family etc. which will be hard, but if you have to do it. Excommunicate your time, your support, your dollars. Do it now! You should be getting toxic people out of your lives anyway. That’s another post.

Black superhero Series Created by a Black Woman

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/divablue/genesis-the-beginning-the-worlds-first-team?pos=2
Teresa Dowell-Vest created her own superheroes for the AA audience. She is looking for donations to help her series get off the ground. Anyway check it out. We need all the positive images we can get.

Everyone who reads this post please spread the word by posting this on your.   Sort of like a tag game.  Or more precicely the Filipino Tag Game on YT.  If you read it post it on your blog then send and email informing someone else and ask them to put it on theirs and so on.  I guess it’s also sort of like a chain.  The person you send it to has to do the same with another blog, website etc.  Oh and I nearly forgot you can repost this whole posting on your site.  I have not problem with it.

BWWM-BWIR Research for Story Ideas

First I emailed CS1 and she said yes she would like to do a post on the production code (not sure when though).

She also asked I could post on my site a call for information

” Hey everyone! I want to write an bwirr period piece. I have checked out the loving site http://www.lovingday.org/legal-map for irr legalities of states in the past. I also realize there were probably relationships and families even when it was illegal. I have been wanting to do this for a while now. I want to write a story possibly a screenplay, maybe a novel that has bwirr in it (not sure of the time yet). Only problem is I am having a hard time finding stories about ir in the past. I know it went on because Evia had a couple of posts of bwwm from the 50’s. I also know that there were bm-ir (frontier house) tv series bm-ww so I know there had to be stories of the reverse. The book Having our Say even shows that there were bw-wm couples. Of course we can’t forget the Wedding. If anyone has any information with articles, websites, books etc. Please email me at blackwomenmakingmovies@mail.com “

Fight for the Image of Black Women! This Means WAR!

http://dateawhiteguy.blogspot.com/

After learning about the John Mayer comments I won’t be listening to him anymore.  That would be like supporting a pedophile (R. Kelly anyone?) I’m sorry, but I support those who respect us .  I don’t mind if he’s not into black women, but his comments show that he has no respect for black women and women in general.  He’s a dbrjm, dbrwm, and just a dbr in general.  Too much media attention on these fools gives good men and women a bad name.  That’s why I’m so sick of this so called New Hollywood.  Anyways ladies don’t let this fool make you feel that all white men or non-bm think this way. 

This is just one man stating his opinion.  Frankly I don’t even think he should have commented.  Also the question should never been asked anyway.  I mean seriously where did that question come from?  Personally I think it’s just a new covert way for the media to defame black women.  But that’s okay, because I am seriously thinking about leaving Hollywood’s ass alone. 

Frankly I’m all for leaving Hollywood’s ass.  There are other media out there besides Hollywood.  Everyone check out http://blackwomenmakingmovies.blogspot.com  Cool blog she advocates black women creating our own movie industry and I’m with her on that.  We need to boycott the Hell out of Hollywood by making our own movies.

Frankly I also believe that Hollywood would be better if it would go back to the way old Hollywood used to be.   People complained about the conservativeness of old Hollywood, but who do we respect more the Carey Grants, Clarke Gables, Claudette Cloberes, Audrey Hepburns, Grace Kelleys, Doris Days and believe me some of these people had some love triangles, drug and alcohol addictions and others, but they did not air their laundry all over the street for everyone to see and hear (unless it was around their peers of course).  Now compare that with the Hiltons, Lohans, Mayers etc.  When I was younger I thought they 1930’s Hayes Production Code was ridiculous, but after reading it I think something like that needs to come back.  Yes there are things in it that are ridiculous like no interracial relationships etc., but it demanded that if you talked about another culture, religion you give it respect.   I look at the pre-code era and while they had cool movies I often wonder what would Hollywood have been like now if the code hadn’t been imposed in the 30’s.  Looking at how movies and other media I think it would be ten times worse.  One big rule I would add is that if special effects don’t move the story then you don’t need it.lol  I’m actually quite surprised at how many people agree that the movie industry is going to far and if we aren’t careful will be almost at a point of no return.

To check out the Hayes Code http://www.artsreformation.com/a001/hays-code.html http://productioncode.dhwritings.com/multipleframes_productioncode.php http://historymatters.gmu.edu/d/5099/

I’m actually hoping that coolsplash talks about this on her blog. Mainly because she mentioned The Genius of the System about the old Hollywood Studio System. In fact I am going to ask her if she will do a post on it. Here’s hoping.

Also there are many bw who are worried that wm and other non-bm will start treating us as bm do.  All I have to say on that one (because yes this is one of my fears too) is that we have to remember to vet the hell out of all men.  No matter what the race be they black, white, asian, yak we need to vet.

Someone proposed a league similar to what Jews have http://www.adl.org/about.asp  I am all for an anti defamation league for bw.  Maybe it’s the mean streak in me, but I’m all for some people losing their jobs if we have to go there like Don Imus (and making sure that job is gone).  Ruin some careers if we have too.  I know that sounds harsh, but as bw we don’t have the protections of other women so we probably will have to get hardcore in a way people degrading and disrespecting us will mos def not want coming their way.

Do You Think the Bachelor and Other Shows Promote Racism?

Here’s an interview with Marshana Ritchie http://www.intouchweekly.com/2008/04/the_bachelor_london_calling_ma.php

 http://www.ostroyreport.com/2010/01/is-abcs-bachelorbachelorette-racist.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-ostroy/is-abcs-emthe-bachelorbac_b_412618.html

http://www.brandidentityguru.com/wordpress/2010/01/04/the-bachelor-and-bachelorette-brands-cant-be-more-racist/

When white and other non black people start commenting on this then you know something’s wrong.  Anyway remember when I was saying don’t get on shows like Jerry Springer, Rikki Lake (gone etc.) Tyra.  Well leave the Bachelor and other shows like it the hell alone too.  The only reason these shows pick us is so they can throw us out faster than we can say “Yes I will marry you.”   It’s also away to show us as mean, loud, ghetto and other stereotypes they can think of.  And it’s not just us http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2010/01/the-bachelor-channys-off-color-landing-strip-comment-not-appreciated.html they are doing it with others as well.  Actually I think they are finding harder targets when black women know so they are going to go to other women of color doing this mess.  I don’t want to say I told you so (which I just did I guess) to non/bw and non/bm/wm that they are going to treat them the same.  But back to us.    You’ve seen in some of the comments from this site as well as others that people are in such denial.  I like what one commenter said in the first link.  That it’s naïve for someone to think that these producers are only getting women and men of their race; because that’s who they find attractive.  Damn straight.  It’s severe naïvety.  To say that it’s not racist to go pick girls/men based on what they think white America wants to see is just as racist as White America not wanting to see a black women or even a black man or another person of color either being the bachelor or the bachelorette or one of the contestants is just as racist in a multi-ethnic/racial/cultural society.  This goes for other races who think this way as well.   Marshana subjected to racism and then just taken off when it was the other girl who started the mess.  To Make matters worse, the other white women started in on her too.  That’s the only fight they show and she gets kicked off.  Also if any of you have seen that particular Bachelor then you will remember when Matt kissed her and the other girls were like eww why kiss her.  He should kiss so and so or at least us, but ewww why her?  Now if that doesn’t show racism I don’t know what will.  The thing is it’s so covert that most, well there are many white who don’t think it’s racism, but we know better.  What I am starting to see though is that many wm do take notice of the lack of black people and other people of color on these shows.  White women are noticing it too.  So these fools that like to comment talking about it’s not racist are a trip.  Then one of the fools mentioned that we have Flav or Love like all bw want to be on a show like that or be with a man like that.  I still remember the interracial dating reality show was planned by with a wm bachelor with two sons who was looking for a bw to marry.  The show was pitched to VH1, but was rejected, because it would show respectable black women and not the hot ghetto messes that are usually shown on these shows.  http://www.hiphopdx.com/index/news/id.5675/title.boycott-launched-against-vh1  It’s not surprise though that they would choose the type of women like NY, or the women you see on Flav, Charm School and Rock of Love (this man never finds his Mr. Right) etc.  Frankly I think it would be cool if this show does manage to get on air then after he finds his he has another white, asian etc. bachelor who is looking for a bw to be his wife.  http://www.hiphop-elements.com/article/read/4/17987/1/ Now that would be cool, because these dating shows defeat the purpose when the same person is always looking for Mr. Right or Mr. Right.  I mean seriously Rock of Love has been on how long? 

Frankly I think it would probably should be online or something.  Now that would also be cool.  Have an online series like the bachelor/Bachelorette/Joe Millionaire/American Princess (yeah find me that Duke.lol) etc.  that is possibly independent that way no network execs. have the power to influence it.  It would still have to have commercial appeal and some drama here and there to keep people interested, but definitely could stay away from the VH1 style crap.

If I could find that Mashana/Robin video.

Parallel Tales, Dysfunctional Wails, Love in Black and White and Not Everything Nice

Does anyone notice something with these four movies? Yes they were made in different decades, but there is something sinister hidden between the lines. Look at the first two movies then at the last two movies and what do you notice? Well I will tell you what I notice. I see two of these movies in which black women fall in love with a man outside of their race or goodness forbid find a man of quality no matter the race.  Then the next movies they do are bw/bm, but these black men they have as co-stars can co-star up and fall in love with ww and other non-bw, but we are stigmatized.  I say time to nip that crap in the bud!  Seriously Whitney gets a movie like The Bodyguard and then Waiting to Exhale about black women ending up alone and then accepting that as the black woman’s fate.  Are you freaking kidding me?  I do have to say I love the fact that she went on to do The Preachers Wife (love both the original and the remake) Same with Saana.  She gets a role in which she finds a quality man who happens to be white and then is cast in other movies along side white men and other non-bm.  How she is paid back in return is a role in which she an educated black woman (because remember educated black women and men are villified in TPs movies even black people who were in denial are waking up to this fact) marries a man below her level and to top that off he hits her and her family does nothing, cause she know she done did him wrong.  WTF?  Pardon my French, but WTF!

It’s like Saana is being punished for not keeping with movies like

 or A. k. A. We all know that wasn’t no act of love in that movie.  That was more like a black women being encouraged to take dbrbm’s ish.  The title Disappearing Acts is more appropriate (being that that was the movies title as well.)  I wonder why the change?   As someone stated before we all know that had this story been about a white woman her man leaving would have hurt, but been a bump in the road and she would have found someone else who would have fallen in love with both her and the child her after her loser ex leaves them behind.  We get Snipes and ww get Scott how freaking unfair is that?  I mean seriously the character has a dbag of a husband who leaves her because their baby didn’t come out perfect and have a short time to live.  Her brother in-law (yeah I know it’s like what, but hey I can look past that one in this movie it’s Campbell Scott for goodness sakes!) who is a doctor knows more about the child than her own ex.  He has the audacity to want to come back, but wait to get married or have a serious relationship until the child dies so he can start over like she never existed.  She basically lets this dbr know it ain’t happening and thats where the doc comes in.  Now we all know that ww would not put up with crap like Disappearing Acts or Act of Love (it’s trying to call itself. haaa, lol).  We need to let these movies and books of this ilk die.  I love Terry M., but seriously her books, the movies the books were adapted from are so messed up and damaging.  I was young so I didn’t appreciate movies like Stella Got Her Grove Back etc. Well that’s not true, because I loved movies like Frankie and Johnny ( I don’t know how many times I watched that movie) and more mature adult romances.  I think many of the movies like Waiting to Exhale, Stella Got Her Grove Back, DA and others I knew no I felt that something wasn’t right.  I was too young to put my finger on it, but now that I am older I can see these relationship stories were way dysfuntional.  There’s nothing wrong with a little dysfunction in some drama, because it wouldn’t be drama without some jackedupocity, but damn.

 I can only imagine what would have happened with Whit if she had stayed in Hollywood.  Both of these bw and many other aspiring actresses need to look at Whoopi.   man I love that movie. She has done movies with wm as well as bm love interests, but I have yet to really notice her do something like TFTP’s etc.  I hope she stays away from that as well.  I say if they have to go to she small H’wood film or independent film route then for goodness sakes go that route please!